January 19th, 2004
Attention Tim Horton Marketeers:
Your doughnuts, your sandwiches, your coffee mugs, and your entire stinking wanna-be corporate empire are NOT Canadian institutions.
Furthermore, just because you can advertise that they are, making up ethnocentric stories about students in Scotland (both insulting and condescending to the Scottish people in one dreadful stroke) and horrid little tales about Tim Mug recognition in Europe (oh, and about ten years too late; Canadians don't have such a wonderful reputation in the world anymore--wanna guess why? I guess American-style blowing your own horn has a negative effect, eh? We're not worth so much when we walk around telling ourselves and others how great we are, eh?), people are not inspired to become proud Canadians by buying your doughnuts.
This little fantasy world you are trying to establish whereby Canadians are recognised by their doughnut shops is stupid, embarrassing, and more than a little irritating.
Just because you can say it doesn't make it true.
* * *
Got a new contract; it starts later this week. Yippee.