December 13th, 2006
Back in about 1996 I started using Yahoo! for all my searches and online email needs ... I even set up my first web site through them, though that particular site is long gone, melted back into the digital sea.
And when it came time to set up my email address, I was able to grab brianporter at {yaknow-whoo!} dot com, which, though I didn't realise it at the time, was something of a coup. There weren't enough users online yet that common names had all been snapped up, so I got lucky and got my own name first.
(Now, of course, I don't use it on this website, since I don't want to make it into a nice soft spam target, so I have an alternate email address, b_porter@yahoo.com, that I use for just that purpose, and sweet baby Jesus does it ever get spam! I mean, about 200-300 pieces of shit per day usually, and it is to Yahoo!'s great credit that less than 1/4 of 1% of spam ever soils my inbox. If you send me an email to that address, I promise I will get it, though; I do check that account for "real" email, and I actually do get a few people a week sending email to that address about various non-spam-related issues .)
Over the years it has been a great advantage to have "brianporter at" as my email address in Yahoo! simply because it is easy to remember, so people who know me always know my online email address (though with webmail the way it is these days, just about any email address is an online one).
But there are definitely some things about having "brianporter at" as my email address that are definitely not an advantage. Being easy to remember, of course, is a sword that cuts two ways: It's easy to remember which means all those other Brian Porters out there (and there are more than I am happy to admit) have friends who could sloppily, though somewhat easily, misremember those other Brian Porters' email addresses as my own. Since it is just my two names concatenated, it is an obvious assumption.
But (I hear you asking) how many of those emails do I get? Well, about two or three per week. And usually from the same people who keep making the same mistake over and over again:
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Why, just today I learned from Brian Porter's sister Carol (as forwarded to me by their dad) that Maxwell the Cat has a vet appointment tomorrow. It's "mostly routine" though he might have "broken his ankle or something" on account of the way he "clicks when he walks". Oh dear. That cat would make a terrible mouser, wouldn't he?
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On Monday, Danelle thoughtfully wrote to remind "me" to attend Scott's 35th birthday party. I can't wait; my plane ticket to Denver is already booked. (I have Danelle's phone number and address, too; the auction is now open with bidding starting at $100). According to the invitation reminder, "Vodka, mixers, food, and darts" will be supplied. Geez, cue the Sesame Street song: "One of These Things Doesn't Belong Here" ... I hope at least they won't get so shellacked on Vodka that they forget which direction to throw the darts!
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Ron emailed "me" again to ask where I was working these days (he always starts his emails, "Porter.....")
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Sofia wants me to let my clients know about some fabulous real estate offerings coming up soon along the Oregon coast. Actually, I know which Brian Porter she intended to send that to ... I have the .ca domain only because this particular Brian Porter (who is a real estate agent) got the .com domain first. What hurts is that I could've had it in 1996, but decided to wait a couple of years. Oh well.
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And, finally, some Brian Porter's dad wrote from somewhere on the "upper Yucatan peninsula" to ask him, now that Granddad was dead, were there any problems with having "the estate left to Liz and having her make the distribution to everyone?" Yikes! I actually tried to contact these people, because it sounded important, but I heard nothing back—not even a "thanks". No good deed goes unpunished, I guess. Next time I won't bother.
There are a whole lot more, but I think that sort of gets the point across. If, of course, you want to talk to me about anything, you should always feel free to email me.
Vodka and darts anyone?
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